October 24, 1999
It was a mostly slow and lazy Sunday, and I'm going to give you a more or less disjointed journal entry. I spent much of the day reading a book called "Notes from Myself", which is about the journaling process. The author included a lot of thought-provoking quotations, and every so often I'd stop to write something down that a quotation inspired in me. Perhaps not a particularly interesting way to spend a Sunday, but nonetheless, here it is. Sometimes I've included the quote, sometimes I haven't. Neener.
What am I grateful for? (too many things!)
- Keith
- My family that has always been supportive and full of love
- All the things I've had the opportunity to see and do (live in beautiful cities, visit Europe, drive across the country)
- My job, that I like
- Keith
- That I am not depressed
- The change of seasons
- Keith
There are many things that I could put on this list that have to do with Keith and the impact and effect he has had on my life, but I will unashamedly lump those all together and name them "Keith", because he has made me so very grateful in so many ways.
--
The value of humor in my life -- my IPC class taught me that one of my family themes is humor -- we laugh, constantly laugh, about anything and everything. Family stories are always funny stories and I never laugh more than when I am with my family -- except now, when I am with Keith.
--
"Perception by another person is missing when one lives by oneself and one can feel diminshed and unreal, a shadow person."
-- Anne Hazard Alrich
I often felt this way when living alone. I was so constantly introspective that sometimes I lost track of how I fit into my world. I felt disconnected from the world and disconnected from myself. Nothing seemed to matter -- whatever I did and whatever I said were ephemeral. No one saw or heard but me, there was no record, no one would remember. It made me feel less real somehow, as though I required some sort of external validation to make myself true. I did feel like a "shadow person" most of the time -- a feeling that took a long while to dissipate, even after I emerged from the cocoon of my apartment and began to socialize again.
--
"A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step."
-- Lao Tzu
I have come over a thousand miles and my first step was aided by a helping hand -- I did not walk alone, rather I had my best friend and confidante at my side.