October 14, 2002
Motherhood: a series of lists.
Items I have fished out of Zeke's mouth:
- Leaf from unidentified plant
- Onion skin
- Pages of magazine
- Pages of library book
- Hair with unidentifiable bit of gunk on end
- Lint from fuzzy sweater
- Wrong end of baby spoon (it got stuck)
- Piece of plastic drink lid
- Drinking straw
- Price tag from new pair of pants
- Super ball (that one was exciting)
- Metric ton of carpet fuzz
Names Zeke has been called by:
- Pookie Pie
- Little Mister Zekie Head
- Captain Crap-My-Pants (not Keith's favorite)
- Slobbersaurus Rex
- Mama's Little Lima Bean/Pumpkin Pie/Honey Bun/Tater Tot/[food item of your choice here]
- Melonhead
- Honey Bunny, then just Little Bunny, then just Bunny, then just Bun-Bun
- The Boss
- Schmoopinator
- Cutest of All Possible Boys (unwieldy but surprisingly common)
Places I have breastfed Zeke:
- Boeing Museum of Flight in the movie exhibit
- Washington State ferry
- front seat of the car (not while the car was in motion, of course)
- Northgate Mall
- Bellevue Square Mall
- 2002 Fremont Solstice Parade
- Too many restaurants to name
- Children's Hospital cafeteria
- Pediatrician's waiting room
- Work
- Airplane bathroom, airplane seat, and airport gate, my preference being the gate due to being more spacious
- Cedar Point, Sandusky OH ("America's Roller Coast")
- Driveway to Girl Scout camp, approximately 10:30 PM, coming home from said amusement park (no arrests were made)
- Rental office of our apartment building while filling out application
- Beach
Number of times someone has made a negative comment or given me a nasty look while breastfeeding Zeke: Zero.
Phrases I used to start with "I will never" and I now start with "I did":
- "...drink caffeine while pregnant."
- "...drink diet pop while pregnant."
- "...feed Zeke solid food before he is six months old."
- "...let Zeke get his hands on anything chokable."
- "...let Zeke watch TV shows until he's at least a toddler."
- "...drink coffee while breastfeeding."
- "...survive it if Zeke gets really sick." (I really thought this when he was a brand new newborn.)
- "...really have a baby."
Times I have actually felt my heart stop:
- When Keith was taking the backpack carrier off his back, with Zeke in it, and suddenly he lost his grip on one side, and it swung free, taking Zeke with it and leaving Zeke almost directly upside down for a split second. (He was held in by the safety straps and thought the whole thing was hilarious.)
- When we arrived at Children's Hospital one morning and the nurses told us we couldn't go in yet. (They were doing a surgical procedure to insert his chest tube, but for a brief yet horrible moment, I feared the worst.)
- One day when I went into the living room to check on Zeke while he napped, and couldn't see him; I briefly and irrationally thought he must have somehow crawled out onto the patio (through two closed and locked doors!) and fallen twenty feet to the ground. Turns out, he was just snuggled deep under his blanket.
- Any time I am in another room and Keith is minding Zeke, and I hear a thud or thump or crash or cough. I always run from what I am doing to check on them, and they always look at me like I am crazy, and Keith silently points to the toy that fell to the floor, or whatever it was that made the thumping sound.
Things that make Zeke laugh hysterically:
- Being tickled just under his collarbone, but only when he's in the right mood
- When I make a loud slurping sound and pretend to eat his hand and then do it again a few seconds later, and then do it again a few seconds later...
- Playing "upside down baby" where I turn him upside down and then right side up and then upside down and then right side up... (I have never met a child who does not love this.)
- Tummy zerbers
- Peek-a-boo (especially good when I hide around the corner from him and then stick my head out and say "Boo!")
- "The tickle monster is going to get you! Here he comes! You can't escape the tickle monster! GITCHA GITCHA GITCHA GITCHA GITCHA! Here he comes again! Here comes the tickle monster!"
Times I am glad to be a mom:
- In the morning when I wake up next to my sweetie
- At breakfast when I feed him
- At naptime when he sleeps like a little angel
- At lunchtime when he smears avocado into his hair
- In the afternoon when he plants wet sloppy kissies on my cheek
- During walks when he giggles every time he gets to touch tree bark with his bare feet
- In the evening when he shrieks with delight to see his daddy walk through the door
- At bathtime when half the water winds up outside the tub and he is obsessed with the trickle of water coming from the faucet
- At the end of the day when he drowsily nurses off to sleep and then curls up next to me, in the warmth of my body
- And every other time of day, too.