January 19, 2000
I got an email from Charles that made me realize that I didn't relate the end of the story yesterday about our hunt for the Perfect Text Editor. We wound up deciding on BBEdit, which is what I'd originally suggested anyway. My boss wanted me to find second opinions supporting this on the Web, though, because God knows it's better to trust some random stranger off the Internet than it is to trust one of your employees.
I'm sorry, did that sound bitter?
Stuff. Last night Keith and I had a little bit of a fallout, which I am still somewhat upset about, so I am not going to write about it right now. Maybe I'll write about it tomorrow. We managed to make up enough so that we didn't go to bed angry, and this morning I kissed him goodbye and told him to have a good day and everything. I'm not angry at him still, or anything, just still a little upset. In general. Not really at him. But like I said, I'll tell you about it some other time.
OK, I changed my mind. I bet that looked really quick while you were reading this, didn't it? One minute, I'm not going to talk about it, and the next minute, whoa! I changed my mind! But really there was about half an hour in there, during which time I listened to half of the Blues Brothers CD and drank an entire cup of coffee. Isn't that amazing? All in the time it took your eye to drop from one line to the next. It's the magic of technology, I tell you what.
All right, so I'll tell you what happened in a nutshell. A big nutshell. Like, a walnut. Or maybe even a coconut.
Keith and I have been planning this trip to Minnesota this weekend, for over a month. We have our plane tickets and everything. Why Minnesota? Well, a bunch of people we know from the Internet are meeting there, and in fact Keith knows at least one of them from real life too, and they're a bunch of friends that we haven't seen in a long time. So, we're going to Minnesota. We have the plane tickets already, did I mention that?
So last night, Keith (who, incidentally, was running a fever of 102) informs me that because a big important product is about to ship, and because he missed work on Monday and Tuesday because he was sick, he might have to work this weekend to get the product out on time.
But, this weekend is our trip, I said, thinking he'd just forgotten.
Yeah, I know, he said.
I just looked at him like he was crazy. I thought he was kidding for a minute, and then I realized he wasn't. I felt so strange, like I'd been hit by a truck and yet, I was still standing.
The reason I was so upset.. well, it just took me by surprise. Keith was saying "I might have to work because this product needs to go out and it's my responsibility," and what I heard was, "I love my job more than I love you, and I have no problem canceling my plans with you on a moment's notice so that I can fulfill my work responsibilities."
I was REALLY hurt and upset. I couldn't even talk to him. He was saying stuff, but I didn't hear him. I had to go to the store anyway, because Keith needed aspirin, a thermometer, and 7-Up, so I just went downstairs and got my coat and told him I didn't really want to talk about this right now, and left and went to the store.
Going to the store was a good idea, because it gave me time to cool off. (An example of how upset I was: I stopped by Taco Time to pick up dinner, and until I got home, I had no idea what I'd ordered. It turned out to be a crisp bean burrito, a crisp beef burrito, and a soft beef taco. No mexi-fries. I think I just picked random crap off the menu. No wonder the guy at the window was looking at me so funny.)
By the time I got home, I was calmed down enough to at least be able to talk to Keith.
What I wanted to hear, initially, was:
"Oh, baby, I love you so much that I don't care what work wants me to do, I'm going on this trip with you this weekend like we planned. You mean more to me than any stupid work project ever could. I love you."
What Keith said was:
"You have to understand that I have a responsibility at work to finish this project on time. I'm late already because I wasn't getting the right kind of help from the right people, and then being sick this week didn't help either. If I go to the wall on this issue and refuse to come in this weekend, they'll think I'm an unreliable employee, I won't get promotions, I won't move up in the company, and I won't get a good referral when I eventually leave them."
What I said in response was:
"I understand that you care about your job, but listen, it's not your fault that you got sick and they need to understand that. You already have plans for this weekend, and we already have our tickets, and it's not fair to me to cancel with three days' notice, and I don't think it's fair for your employers to ask you to do that."
We went back and forth for awhile, but that's the heart of the issue. What made me feel better was when Keith said:
"You do realize that I'm not just going to go in and say "I've been sick, so you want me to come in on Saturday?", right? I'm going to talk to my boss, find out what he needs, and I'm going to tell him that I have this trip scheduled this weekend. Hopefully, he'll understand that. But if he really needs me to come in this weekend to finish this project, I can't just tell him no."
That made me feel better because it meant that Keith was at least going to try his best to make it this weekend on the trip. Also, I do understand that Keith has a really strong work ethic (if I told him that, he might disagree with me, but compared to 95% of people in the world, Keith has an amazing work ethic) and he takes his job VERY seriously. I do respect that. I just wish that on this particular occasion he had a crappy work ethic and wouldn't mind ditching his responsibilities for a weekend just to spend time with me. Selfish? Yes. Something I actually want? Not really. I like Keith the way he is. It's just frustrating occasionally.
Anyhow, he went to work today, so I guess when he comes home he'll have talked to his boss and found out what's happening. I really hope he can go with me this weekend. I mean, how depressing will it be for me to be on a plane for four hours next to an empty seat where my sweetie is supposed to be? Bleah.
Old Navy sucks.The night before last, this really cute Old Navy commercial came on. It wasn't one of the really lame ones with the twins and the dog and Carrie Donovan. It had little cartoon characters or something. I said, "Whoa! That's a non-suck Old Navy commercial!" And Keith said, "Yeah, it's totally adorable, but it doesn't change the intense hatred I feel for Old Navy." I agreed with him. After being bombarded with horrendous commercials for years, the only way I would set foot in an Old Navy store is if someone were holding a gun to my head. Maybe not even then. I think I'd go into a comatose state or something. No commercials have ever inspired such fiery hatred from me. Not even the Taco Bell talking chihuahua commercials.
God smiles upon Seattle, car accidents ensue. Three or four days ago, there was a 26-car pileup on I-5. It was just a horrendous accident. What caused it?
Guess.
Come on, guess.
Rain, you say? Nope. High winds? Wrong again. Did it snow? Nuh-uh.
No, there was a 26-car pileup on I-5 because THE SUN CAME OUT. You heard me. It had been raining, and the sun came out from behind a cloud, and everyone was blinded and wrecked their cars into each other.
Does this happen in any other city? I don't think so.
THE FORUM: What makes your city unique?
MORE FORUM: People are STILL talking about what they have and have not done.
EVEN MORE FORUM: A lot of people had really good Dad stories.